Important Questions to Ask Your Spouse… An Excerpt from My Book on the Dallas Theological Seminary Website
Here is a helpful excerpt from my book that appears on the DTS website. It includes a variety of extremely useful questions for you and your intercultural fiance or spouse to ask each other. Check it out at http://www.dts.edu/publications/read/excerpt-from-your-intercultural-marriage-marla-deshong-alupoaicei/.
Hello! Here’s a great article on the do’s and don’ts of blogging from Michael Hyatt, who operates an “Intentional Leadership” blog. Since most of us have blogs, I thought I’d share it with my readers. Thanks!
“In 1919, a young man who had been injured in the war in Europe moved to Chicago, picking one particular neighborhood in order to be close to the noted author Anderson’s . The young writer, impressed with the critical praise heaped on Winesburg, Ohio, had heard the novelist was willing to assist beginning writers. The two men became close. They met every day to read together, exploring the writing of newspapers and magazines, and eventually tearing apart the inner workings of novels. The young man brought his own work to Anderson, who helped him see how he could improve his craft. Anderson even introduced the young writer to his network of publishing associates, and helped him publish his first novel, which was met with critical acclaim. Its title was . The young man’s name was .
Sherwood Anderson then moved to New Orleans, where he took another young author through those same paces, even putting up $300 of his own money to help that beginning writer’s first novel get published. The novel was entitled Soldier Pay. The author’s name was .
Anderson would then move to California, where he worked with a young writer by the name of John Steinbeck. Sherwood Anderson shaped modern American writing more profoundly than any author except Mark Twain. Most of the writing instructors of the late 20th century were, in one way or another, disciples of Anderson.
And the reason Sherwood Anderson was so committed to mentoring beginning writers? Because when he was young, a more experienced author by the name of had invested in his own life and craft. It’s why I’m a fan of beginning writers finding a Sherwood Anderson to help them develop.”
What a cool and intriguing testimony to the power of helping others succeed! And Theodore Dreiser just happens to be from my hometown of Terre Haute, IN, which makes this story even more fascinating to me! Thanks for sharing, Chip.
How do you define success in life? On his website, Christian literary agent Chip MacGregor has a thought-provoking blog on this topic. http://chipmacgregor.typepad.com/main/ He explains that from a market standpoint, most people define an author’s success in two simple words: book sales. If you sell a ton of books, you’re successful. But he goes on to expand that definition and explain how the real measure of success is SIGNIFICANCE.
It’s true that, even in Christian publishing, the bottom line (money) is the bottom line. Publishers are in it to make money, and the more books you can sell, the more money they make. And the more they love you.
But I think that the downturn in the economy has changed Americans’ values a lot. I know it’s affected me. Yes, my goal as a writer, editor and speaker is to be as successful as possible. But significance is more important. If I can help people, if I can influence and inspire them to live a better life, then I have succeeded. God has given my husband and me a dynamic and unique platform for ministry. We feel that it’s our call to share the message that the Lord has laid on our hearts in order to inspire, encourage, and uplift others in their spiritual walk and their marriage journey.
In my travels as an author and speaker, I’ve met many other authors who may never reach #1 on the New York Times bestseller list, yet they are warm, inspiring, godly and fun-loving people with fascinating stories to share. They have loved me and provided me with great encouragement as a young author. They have given me practical advice and helped me expand my ministry and build my platform. I’m forever grateful to them. And to me, they are all successes, whether they ever sell another book or not. Best of all, they are SIGNIFICANT.
In the spiritual life, not all success is measurable in dollars and cents. It’s not measurable in inches, pounds, or any type of numerical system. For example, Jesus said, “Follow Me.” This SEEMS to be one of the simplest commands in the Bible, but HOW PROFOUND. Man, to follow Him every day is not easy, is it? “Follow Me” means “imitate Me, love Me, sacrifice your needs and wants for Me, show Me to others, obey all of My commands.”
To me, success means following Jesus, no matter what.
I’ve spoken to several men and women recently who seem to be trudging dolefully through a tough stage in their lives and their marriages, as though they’re dragging a ten-ton stone behind them. I understand completely. Our son, Evan, just turned one on July 6. Having him has been an unspeakable joy, yet this has also been by far the most challenging year of my life. (The fact that I’m eight months pregnant with our second child may have something to do with that!)
Life changes, big and small, cause upheaval. Maybe for you, it’s been a move, financial struggles, a marriage, a divorce, a death in the family, or the loss of a job. I don’t think that I’ve ever encountered so many people struggling with an identity crisis, a feeling of wondering what on earth happened to the person that they used to be. And yes, I’ve wondered that pretty much every day myself since the day my baby son was born.
What has gotten me through is the fact that even when I’m no longer sure how all of the complex aspects of myself, my family life, and my creative pursuits fit together, God is. He knows who I am. And more important, I know who He is. HE IS THE GREAT I AM. Isn’t it interesting and odd that when Moses asked, “Who should I say you are?” God said simply, “I AM.” His identity is in His being, His perfection, His holiness, His integrity. He does not have to DO anything to be Himself; He simply has to BE.
The truth is, you are. God made you. You are here on the earth, and you are here for a reason. No one has ever been like you, with your unique combination of characteristics, personality traits, quirks, sense of humor, gifts, and abilities. If you’re a writer, God has gifted you with a voice and a way to write and describe things that is special and particular to you. If you don’t write those ideas down and share them with the world, no one else will.
Part of loving God, loving yourself and loving other people is using your voice and your gifts to communicate your personal message.
In November, I had the privilege of traveling to Little Rock to be interviewed by Dennis Rainey and Bob Lepine on the topic of intercultural marriage and my book, Your Intercultural Marriage: A Guide to a Healthy, Happy Relationship. I shared some juicy tidbits about the intriguing twists and turns of our romance and marriage journey, as well as practical tips and helpful marriage advice for couples. Here’s a link to the video feed if you’d like to watch it! http://www.familylife.com/site/c.dnJHKLNnFoG/b.5834071/k.14B6/Marla_Alupoaicei__Intercultural_Marriages.htm Blessings.
On Nov. 3, Keith Bardwell stepped down from office as a justice of the peace in Louisiana. The governor as well as many other officials had called for Bardwell’s resignation after receiving complaints about Bardwell’s stance against granting marriage licenses to interracial couples. This is a victory for intercultural/interracial couples in Louisiana! See below for more details.
“A good marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” ─Ruth Bell Graham
A friend just recommended that I check out this article, written by an American man who married a woman from Japan. He shares some excellent insights about intercultural marriage as well as some important warnings and advice for those contemplating intercultural marriage. Here is the link to the site: http://www.larabell.org/cross.html
Thanks for the recommendation, J.!
Hi! I am going to be holding a book signing for Generation Hex on Saturday, Sept. 6th (that’s THIS Saturday) from 2-4 p.m. at The Open Door Christian Bookstore in Terre Haute, Indiana. The Open Door is located behind Honey Creek Mall, at 3125 Third Place, Terre Haute, Indiana, 47802. You may also visit the website at http://www.opendoor-christian-store.com.
I hope you will join us! We will have a drawing for several GREAT door prizes and enjoy coffee and pastries from the newly opened Gingersnaps cafe located in the back of the bookstore. You’ll also have the opportunity to browse the store’s fantastic selection of gifts, books and music.
I look forward to seeing you there! I truly appreciate your prayers and your support for us and our book. If you have any questions, feel free to call me at (214) 497-4614. Thank you!